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The point is, a marriage is a joining of two families as well as two young people.

Few choices and no time to date People may assume that arranged marriages were loveless matches, with frightened young people forced into lives of emotional pain and forbidding loneliness, but such was not always the case.

The courting then took up the first month of marriage.

Through courting, the couple became acquaintances, then friends, gained mutual respect and hopefully the love that would sustain them through married life.

A nervous young man arrives at the door of a majestic brownstone townhouse.

He carries a small wood box containing a silver bracelet and ring, and a bouquet of resplendent burgundy tulips.

How else would a young man and a young woman, meeting perhaps for the first time at the betrothal ceremony, get to know each other?

The betrothal could consist of a simple announcement, much like an engagement party, or something more complex like a partial marriage ceremony with the exchange of rings, a ceremonial kiss and a meal.

There was no time for frivolity–practicality was of the essence.

Steady one-on-one dating at too young an age with no goal of marriage in sight can lead to problems and temptations.

(Of course, courting isn’t the starting place for those not of marriageable age.

Tie adjusted, box and bouquet retrieved, he clears his throat again. No, he’s getting ready for the culmination of months of planning, supervised outings, amiable family dinners, walks in the park with the young lady, conversation in a parlor warmed by an autumn fire and, lastly, a brief, but serious chat with the young woman’s father. Within the confines of courting, appropriate one-on-one dating played an important role; two people of marriageable age got to know one another better, their personalities, interests and so forth, before they made a more serious decision regarding marriage.

The young lady smiles at his nervous display and finally he begins his monologue … Recently courting has been getting a second look by some who sese pitfalls in today’s dating scene.




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With any luck, you’ll catch her gone & be sitting calmly on her bed when she comes back. Just acknowledging that you know she is sneaking out is a big step towards getting everything out in the open.


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Sowell was convicted in 2011 and sentenced to death for killing 11 women whose bodies were found at his Cleveland home.