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They will want to grow old with you and have an age appropriate relationship with you.

From my experience there are few men who are looking to date their contemporaries.

I was on a date with a guy who confessed that on more than one occasion women met with him and within minutes made up an excuse to leave. Or writing your first name with his on a cocktail napkin, and deciding whether or not to hyphenate your last name with his. Dating, especially in middle age, means a higher likelihood of navigating around those other littler people in our lives who make getting to destinations on time more challenging and keeping our dates more exacting. He will tell you who he is during those first few meetings. Split the check so he expects nothing from you in return? Refrain from theatrics if a relationship doesn’t develop as you had hoped. Facts that can be found on your driver’s license reveal little about a person, and will do nothing toward bringing you closer together. You know the basics about each other, but now is the time to strut your stuff. I know many city dwellers that have yet to meet The One, and have widened their search to include areas well outside their densely populated neighborhood. The decisions we make are personal, and we wouldn’t want anyone undermining our choices. They know who they are and why their marriage failed and are looking for pure companionship.They probably won’t be in “awe” of you and hang on your every word. No doubt real life will be waiting when that moment is up. You could be on the other side of that coin one day. Don’t start doing Conan O’Brien’s, in your head about you and your date. Your date could be a great match for you on paper or, as my mother always says, has all the checks in the right boxes, but if that spark isn’t there, it’s important to accept it and move on. No one likes to be on the receiving end of a Q&A session. Prepare for a first date as you would a job interview. When I explained I wasn’t comfortable having a man I barely know to my home, I didn’t hear from him again until he resurfaced a couple of weeks later, apologizing for his less than chivalrous behavior. For those using online dating, expand your search radius and expand your horizons. People come to where they are in life through their own trial and error. Enjoy your time with (hopefully) good company (if not, see letter G), and stay in the moment. Unless you believe you are in imminent danger, try to get through the meeting as quickly but as politely as possible. No matter how many dates a person has had, meeting someone for the first time can be nerve-racking, especially if there is an immediate attraction. Careers, children, grandchildren, friends, and social commitments all factor in, and even if romance is not written in the stars, we can always learn from someone else’s life experience. Sometimes it boils down to plain old chemistry, or a lack of it. Ask questions but be a conversationalist and not an interviewer. A pretty face may get you in the door, but a smart woman is the one who keeps the guy from walking out that door. As soon as I agreed, he followed up with a text asking if he could bring said lunch to my house. I have yet to meet the man of my dreams sitting in my own backyard. If I had a nickel for every time a middle-aged man advised me unsolicited that he doesn’t need Viagra I would… Promises of sexual prowess on a first date make me wary, and I can’t help thinking back to high school English when one Lady Macbeth “doth protest too much.” W. No one person is ever at fault in a marriage’s end (except in cases of abuse), and I’m wary of anyone who claims otherwise.




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