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Because of the links between Goth and the 'vampyre' subculture/lifestyle (more coming soon on this), it is often assumed that Goths indulge in blood play (cutting each other or drinking each other's blood during sex). Blood-drinking = not your best idea.) Because of Goth's open-mindedness (yes, that again), there is a general consensus that 'what takes place between consenting adults stays between said adults', but since most Goths (and most vampyres, come to that...) a) do not believe they are vampires, b) do not have any particular affinity for blood (I have a tendency to faint if someone gets a nosebleed in my general vicinity), and c) do not like the idea of or take part in cutting themselves or other people, I would draw the conclusion that this is very unlikely in 99% of cases. Lately, I have also seen many articles on Wiki How with titles such as "How to get a Goth guy to like you (even if you're not Gothic)" and "How to win the heart of a Goth girl". ) that many of these are written tongue-in-cheek or from personal experience, making them about an even mix of amusing and sweet.

However, I would like to point out that 'winning the heart' of your 'dark love' is really not all that different than wooing a 'normal' girl or guy.

Spooky gifts: A gothic necklace (NOT Halloween jewellery, it can be tacky and is likely to fall apart) A heart-shaped box filled with Halloween sweets A bunch of deep red roses A book of dark poetry A mix CD of dark/Goth music A handmade bracelet ..your imagination. Double points if it doubles as an art gallery or bookstore.

One of the best things about dating a goth is that they’re not afraid of what people think – a pretty refreshing quality in this self-conscious day and age. From the way they wear their hair to their choice in clothes, you can’t deny goths are true individuals. You’ll enjoy dating a goth if your politics follow a feminist curve – apparently, it’s the ladies that run the show in the goth world. An ideal date if you’re in need of a nudge in that direction or if you’d like to be able to share and explore your feelings with your partner. Goths are bold and brave – after all, it takes a lot of courage to choose to stand out rather than blend in. We all know doing laundry is a nightmare, so imagine how much easier it would be if everything you needed to wash was the same colour. And black, it must be said, is a very slimming colour choice. If you don’t mind a little rough and tumble goth gigs are seriously fun. You’ll never need to worry about looking tanned…ever again. Whether you’re looking to date a guy or a girl, at least you’ll be able to share eyeliner tips. When you’re hanging out with a group of goths, chances are you’re the cheeriest person in the room! Leather is a real investment piece – so at least your joint fashion purchases will keep their value. They can introduce you to a whole world of new (and old music) from The March Violets to Marilyn Manson. One of the best things about dating a goth is that they’re a genuinely open group of people – perfect if you’d like a partner that can help you find yourself.

A big bouquet and a box of chocolates is still an acceptable gift (although the flowers don't necessarily have to be alive).

Asking someone out for coffee or to the cinema is still perfectly reasonable.

Basically, just because someone is wearing a spiky collar and skintight PVC to a Goth club does not mean she's into S&M.

This post covers some of the ins-and-outs (oo-er, Matron) of Gothy relationships; mostly useful, perhaps, from a non-Goth's perspective.

I'm going to cover some of my least favourite rumours about Goths and dating; some tips for those of you who would like to know how to go about wooing a Goth (what a great word, 'woo'...), and a few helpful links and videos (I'm THAT good to you).

Older Goths feel that they will be expected to 'hurry up and grow out of it'.

Showing that you respect them as they are is likely to earn you many, many brownie points.) So whilst you don't need to impress your loved one by reciting poetry by candlelight, taking her to the funeral home or sending her bunches of dead roses, and you definitely should not change yourself (put down that black hair dye, right now...), some of your gifts or dates could be a little more spooky. A concert - make sure it is a band that you BOTH enjoy. If your town has a small, little-known, out-of-the-way coffee shop (every town seems to have one of these, I think it's a rule), go there.




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